Yesterday, as i was enjoying the increasingly rare opportunity to be just Mommy all day, something interesting and wonderful happened. Beric came up to me as i was sitting in the chair in the living room and he put both of his hands around my arm and gave a squeeze and at the same time he made a very intense face. Maybe because i had been holding space the day before and was still in that holding/noticing mode, i thought to stop him and ask what he was thinking as he did that. He climbed up and curled up into my lap and looked into my face very thoughtfully. Then said, "I was thinking of all the love I share with you."
Mmmmmmm. Total body hum....
After the moment ended and he went back to rolling around with his brother, i found myself reflecting a bit as i watched them wrestling like little kittens. Children are so connected to their hearts and their bodies. They can still experience directly the heart as a generous organ. When a child tells you they love you, it just spills out of them--an overflow of the openness and joy of the present moment. And we hear it as the gift it is. Simple and direct.
Watching them wrestle i see the message of love too. The way they touch each other in play constantly communicates and reaffirms the bond of love they share. There is no separation; feeling, thought and action are in alignment. And i wonder, as their mother, how can i help to preserve this instinct for authenticity, as the dulling pressure of propriety encroaches?
And how do we do that for ourselves--reclaim that gift? --those of us who play with the idea that a different consciousness is possible and therefore a different way of being together. What a challenging thought experiment to try and discern which boundaries actually matter (good and wise structure) and which merely repress. To cast the mind forward into a potentiality where alignment is the norm--and to wonder what we might be like.
No answers here...just more shining questions...and a full and generous heart.
Love ya all